Nothing but Nascar

NASCAR
With my computer at home in the shitter and having to post at lunch not sure how i am going to work this but today is nothing but NASCAR.

Jeff Gordon
F'd me big time. Maybe i will change my view in a day or so but for right now i should just bend over, spread my checks and lube up. I had him this week in my pool. TWO LAMPS TO GO AND HE SPINS OUT AND FINISHED 9TH. WTF!? Good thing the TV i was watching at the time was not mine. MF'er cost me 42 points in the long run. Ya, he finished in the top 10 but he could have scored the first 200 point race of the season. Pissed was not the word. (I quit smoking this weekend on Friday, Made it all the way until Sunday at 5:45pm. Gordon spins, Smoke wins, Dave gets pissed, runs to the store buys a pack of smokes for 6 bucks. I need to quit gambling, And smoking, AGAIN.) My F'ing ass is still sore this morning.

Smoke keeps Rolling
(I love that line.)
3rd win in 4 races. If anyone had momentum on there side rolling into the chase it's Smoke. If he loosed 15lb's he could have shaved .003 seconds off his time. I the last 4 weeks Tony has done nothing but shut his mouth and drive (good choice.) Not sure if Mr. Gibbs said anything to him or not but all of his and Zippy's interview have been yes and no answers.

Speaking of shutting his mouth
Dale (from what i have read) did not say much after the DNF for the blown engine. Tony JR. on the other hand may have opened his mouth alittle too wide. I saw the post race interview on ESPN and Tony said something like "If we make the chase, We make the chase. If we don't, We don't. (pretty sure that's about his exact wording of the situation.) I know Tony's gonna be out of a job and all at the end of the year and all but come on......
Have we given up? Your only 13th in the points. It's not an insurmountable defecate to make up.
Can we get off the pity pot and put your foot to the floor and maybe start you interview process for your job next year?
Enough of that.
Let's get on to the fun parts of the race.

NASCAR.COM's HEADLINE WAS......................
Montoya and Harvick almost come to blows.
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
That was a half a bitch fight, AT BEST. Neither took of there helmet, Hans, or Gloves. I watched the "fight" or altercation if you will, and they were three open hand shots way from being call Juanitta and Kirstie.
They did not remove there helmets. almost none of these guys are perty to begin with but WTF. Kevins the biggest pussy this side of the mississippi (his wife got custody of his balls on there wedding day) no way he was throwing his helmet off. Juan, on the other hand, atleast he pushed Kevin a tad. I thought that he had gotten the better of the "fight" until i saw hos post race interview. What was he wearing on his face? Did he borrow a pair of sunglasses from Paris Hilton? If some of the other drivers like this kid the'll take him to the NASCAR store and buy him a real pair of shades. Holy Crap, Looked like he had stepped out of a fucking fashion mag. Then he went on a Paris Hilton rampage. Here is a couple of quotes.
"I no like what he said to me"
"He was no nice in hes words to me"
"I respect him no more."
He sound like SLEPPY GONZOLES.
"see serior~ Da cheese, She s in da fridge." Zzzzzzzz.......

(I't's almost 1 o'clack. I gotta wrap this up)

MY LAST SU?GGESTION TO NASCAR.
Fill the infield with water on the road courses, or atleast mud.
Like when Denny Or Carl went into the grass, would that have been sooo much better if it had been water and mudd instead or grass and gravel?

(and a side bar. On the road races can we get Mike Goldberg and Joe Rogan from the UFC to announce those? Those of you who watch the UFC will get the joke. Those who did not, tune into spike tv thursday night after 10pm.)

More tomorrow.

DJD

RANDON DAY

I have been busy all week and have not had a minute to post. I will be all over the place today.

PARIS KISSES KAHNE
I am so sick of reading about this dumb bitch every time i click on the net or watch the news. Now there was a story on yahoo sports saying she was seen kissing Kasey Kahne. (cheek kiss and she also said he's hot). Can we use Paris as a f-ing speed bump? I am so sick of seeing here even the old porn takes are no longer interesting.

ALL I WANT THIS WEEKEND IS A HOME RUN
By Barry and A-rod. all this breaking into games to watch them hit is killing me. It's like watching a train wreck in slow motion the way these guys are hitting. Conbined for there last 20 or so at bats there hitting something like .125. ZERO HOME RUNS! I just wish who ever is on the mound wants to be the answer to a trivia question. Toss the the balls underhand and lets get this over with.

A-ROD HAD THE PERFECT OPPORTUNITY
During there 16-4 schilacking of the white socks. Ozzy got tossed, rocket lasted what an inning and a 3rd? Balls were flying out of the park and A-rod could not join the fun.
HOW MANY TIMES DID HE HEAR THIS AS HE CAME TO BAT?
"Your turn A-ROD!"
REJECTED !

CULPEPPER SINGS WITH THE RAIDERS
He's 30. In the league for 8 years (so he's washed up) 6ft 4in 265lb. You get him arrested and he's the perfect fit for the Raiders.

GAGNE TO THE SOX
Smart on his part. Sox are a contenter this year, This is the best chance of him going deep in the playoffs. Good protection for Paps as the closer. And it may give the Japanese guy a rest.
Dye to the redsox would have closed the deal and you could have almost handed the Sox the WS championship baring a titanic meltdown.

Atlanta. THE winner of the trade deadline. The gave Bobby Cox a "Win right now" Team. Pensil in Atlanta deep into September.

Yankee's - Got squat. They traded Proctor (mid 90 fast ball and a work horse) for Wilson Betemit (who?). 26yr old infielder who can play 2nd, short and 3rd but is inconstant at all three.

Padre's -
got and outfielder (Mackowaik) 3rd baseman (Ensberg) and bull pen help (Ledezma). This should be enough to get them back on track, but judging by the "fight" they had the other day i am not sure.

Other than that, Nothing. the deadline came and went and the only two teams that made any kind of sifnigant noise were the sox and braves. Vages has 10-1 and 16-1 odds of both teams making it to the series. (can we parlay that?)

BOSTON, BOSTON, BOSTON
Please come to Boston for the spring, she said NO, You come home to me.
Over the last week it almost seams like home coming. I was wriong about the Celtics singing Allen. Allen and Paul Peirce and no good together, BUT, Throw KG in the mox and you have a perfect "BIG 3". Baring injuries, I expect them to make it deep into the playoff series. This is also your "Win Now" team situation. These guys will only stay together for about 3-4 years tops. KG will be 34-35 and at the end of his career, Peirce will be hitting 32 or so and starting to tail. Allen will be 35-36 and still active for a point guard but his defence will be half of what it once was. If boston does not have, or at least appeared in a championship series this will not have been worth it.
(Now someone please tell the Briuns to follow suite?)

CFB, Collage football
I know the coaches pole should be out any time now. I would guess USC should be at the top of the heap, but........
I would like to throw in LSU and Rutgers (yes Rutgers.)
LSU because it is there 1st "real" seson back.
Rutgers, yup. After last years run he should have a solid freshman class.
My other must-watch team is Boise State. After last years bowl game, no one will ever forget that team or team name.

Michelle Pfeiffer
Is back and sexier than ever. I say the previews for stardust and she looks HHHhhhhhOOOOOoooooTTTTTTttttttt..........
In the words of Homer Simpson. Hmmmmm... Pfei-ffer.....
I love this chick. Something about her that gets me.
And now at 48 (I think) she is still one of the hottest chick in Hollywood.

Which brings me to....
I am soo glad i am growing up in the age where age is getting expanded. Lemme explain....
70 is the new 50, 60 is the new 40, 50 is the new 30, 40 is the new 20, ect, ect.
Being 36 (and still looking good) I could not be happier.

Gotta run.

More monday. (maybe)

DJD